Tuesday, March 31, 2009

She-Who-Cannot-Be-Named

This is meant to be a jest. ;)

Post Harry Potter Era (Book 1): Daughter of Evil.

Arnie Potter sat at her library reading dispatch from Professor Mary Longbottom, daughter of the famous Neville Longbottom. Then she look around her guests. Sighing, she said, "She has returned."

"She-Who-Cannot-Be-Named has returned?" one of the guest, a liberated and rebellious male elf named TAYULANTA, blurted.

"Please, her name is..." Arnie snapped.

"Don't!" screamed a very imposing lady who walked in from through the door. "She is a special case. Unlike Voldemort," several people still hitched at the name, "She has cursed her name with magic we are still not familiar with. Or perhaps, someone else magicked her name so that every person mentioned her name has gone missing. That person must be a very powerful wizard or witch."

"I wish grandfather is still with us now, aunt Lily." lamented Arnie.

"Yes, I wish it is so too..." replied Lily Potter. She knew all the people there was thinking of the long dead Harry Potter, one of the greatest Wizard in the world.

P/S: If you're looking for this book. I am sorry to say there is no such Harry Potter book.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Honourable VS Dishonourable Debate


Honourable DebateDishonourable Debate
Main ObjectiveTo win argument/s.To win argument/s.
ApproachTo create understanding.To undermine opposition.
SettingUsually in friendly and cordial environment.Usually starts with polite conversation but may degenerate into shouting match; or end up insulting or humiliating others.
IntensionHonest.(1) May be honest at first but pride prevents acknowledgement of defeat. (2) Malicious.
DisagreementAccept differences in (point of) view even though opposition is clearly in error.Won't accept differences; or accept but with malicious intend e.g. to be used against opposition; or accept but then forgotten.
WinningWinning arguments is important but not compulsory.Winning is a must; at all cause; or by hook or by crook.
DiscussionLogical and rational, usually with compelling and clear arguments. Will concede weakness in own arguments and will allow opposition to re-clarify or re-explain their weak or erroneous arguments.Logical and rational, usually with compelling and clear arguments. However, once logic and rationale are refuted, will try evasion or manipulation of facts. And usually, if opposition gave weak or erroneous arguments it will be used against them, no quarter.
Defeated by honourable means.Will acknowledge and admit defeat.Won't accept defeat; or accept but with excuses; or simply walk away; or claim foul play by opposition.
ConclusionBoth parties will conclude who wins or accept a draw. Usually will part cordially.Dishonourable party either will always win, or they will not accept defeat even though it stares them at their face. Parting is usually not cordial or even hostile.
Defeated by dishonourable means.No comment! :D Though I guess they will concede defeat but not acknowledgement.The bigger jerk will win the "arguments". :D

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Deadly Bottle

[18SX] Warning: Contains explicit terms.

A 77-year-old man died of heart failure after his penis became stuck in a soft drink bottle. [Read more...] [More detail story here although it is in Chinese. :D However you can copy & paste to Google translation tool for OK translation.]

The moral of the story:
  1. Do not use bottle to entertain yourself.
  2. Get professional advice if you wish to have sex (or masturbate) when you have heart problems or other life-threatening medical problems.
  3. Have sex with proper person (or object?), I mean with your spouse. ;)
  4. Even if you have need to masturbate, use you limb (or other appropriate paraphernalia) not bottle.
  5. Do not wait for days (even if embarrassed) if you need help. The poor guy waited for 2 days before he get help.
Cheers! ;)

Superhero to the rescue: An autistic story...

Is it a plane? Is it a bird? Oh, it's just a spiderman. ;)I was drawn upon AP news “Thai fireman dresses as Spiderman to rescue boy” about a rescue of an autistic boy from danger of fall. Any attempt to get the boy was foiled... by autism. Ah, perhaps I’ve not been clear. ;) Please follow the story then.

In the news, it was the first day of school, the change of environment might have shocked the boy, thus ‘forced’ him to hide at the precariously high of school balcony. Any forced rescue might probably damage the child, not physically, but mentally, and it would be a long time before he might be trusting again.

So, when the resourceful fireman knew the boy loved Spiderman, he immediately went back to his fire station, changed into his Spiderman costume, and then went back to the school to rescue his “fan in distress”.

BTW, what is autism? Quoting Wikipedia: “Autism is a brain development disorder characterized by impaired social interaction and communication, and by restricted and repetitive behaviour.” Meaning, “People with autism have difficulties communicating, forming relationships with others and find it hard to make sense of the world around them.” [AutismSpeaks.com]

It is best to get professional helps such as:
  1. Any government clinic or hospital.
  2. Lion's Resource and Education for Autistic Children a.k.a. REACh (http://lionsreach.net/index.htm).
  3. The National Autism Society of Malaysia (http://nasom.my.diip.net/).
  4. Persatuan C.H.I.L.D Sabah (Tel / Fax: 088-237 761 / 016-831 6952 E-mail: childsabah@yahoo.com)
  5. AutismMalaysia.com [Provides individualised home-based early intervention treatment programmes for children on the Autism Spectrum Disorder.]
Raising an autistic requires enormous effort, skill, and knowledge not to mention love and the most important, patience. While we might watch in awe and respect of those who raise and live with the autistics, we can only imagine the challenges, economic and emotional impacts on the family...

In the end, I salute the parents and professionals who endure and care for autistic children, even love them, for it is, IMHO, among the hardest job in the world: to raise an autistic child to become a person. So, I salute you all, superheroes to the autistic children. ;)

Related link/reading:
http://www.teleautism.net/
http://www.autism.com/
http://www.myhealth.gov.my

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Septuagenarian? No can understand...

Early supercentenarian Ann Pouder (April 8, 1807 – July 10, 1917) photographed on her 110th birthday.I read Bernama news Singapore City-train Service Disrupted today and stumbled upon the word "septuagenarian". I am quite familiar to the word thanks to my previous lecturer. However my poor girlfriend didn't understand the term. So, here I'm doing her (and you all) a service, trying to list all the weird words and their definitions.
  1. sexagenarian: someone whose age is in the 60's (60-69);
  2. septuagenarian: someone whose age is in the 70's (70-79);
  3. octogenarian: someone whose age is in the 80's (80-89);
  4. nonagenarian: someone whose age is in the 90's (90-99);
  5. centenarian: someone who is at least 100 years old.
  6. supercentenarian (sometimes hyphenated as super-centenarian): someone who has reached the age of 110 years. [Wiki]
  7. "pentagenarian": someone whose age is in the 50's (50-59).
I hope it helps. Cheers! ;)

Monday, March 16, 2009

Who is Robert Linggi?

Daily Express, March 16, 2009Elizabeth Majaham of Daily Express wrote a front page article (dated March 16, 2009) titled "Sabahan sues govt over JAC Bill." Who is this Sabahan? According to EM, he is:

1. named Robert Linggi.
2. a "member of the public...";
3. of "Kampung Singga Mata, Bingkor, Keningau"
4. "suing the Federal Government for what he claims is an infingement into his constitutional rights as a Sabahan."

All with (" ") are quoted from the article. Apart from that, he is a mystery, if we only refer to EM's article. :D Intrigued, I google the web looking up "Robert Linggi" and I find that:

1. he is a former cop (Malaysia Today);
2. he is age 64;
3. he had also filed an election petition against Election Commission (which was dismissed).

In the end, I still do not know who is Robert Linggi. Cheers! ;)

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Dear Health Minister

Original title "Health Minister, you owe Sabah answers" reproduced from MalaysiaKini.com. New Sabah Times added: "EDITOR’S NOTE : This letter was first published in the online portal Malaysiakini by a Concerned Citizen and reproduced in the New Sabah Times as this is an issue that concerns every Malaysian in Sabah. It is hoped that MCA leaders in Sabah,in particular Datuk Edward Khoo,take note of this plight and urged his fellow MCA leader,who is the Health Minister,to take immediate measures to rectify this anomaly. We simply cannot wait for a major disaster." On further check, the original letter is from Product of The System's blogspot titled "Open Letter to the Minister of Health." dated Feb 21, 2009.

Health Minister, you owe Sabah answers

Dear Health Minister,

Ali, a 32-year-old road traffic accident victim, travelled three hours from a district in Sabah and arrived in Kota Kinabalu six hours after the initial trauma. After the initial assessment in the emergency department, a CT scan of the head and abdomen was ordered to exclude intracranial bleeding and intraabdominal injury.

He was whisked back onto an ambulance to the privately-owned Sabah Medical Center (SMC) for the required scans. After the ten-minute procedure, he was repacked into the ambulance back to Queen Elizabeth Hospital (QEH) to undergo further assessment while awaiting the results of his blood tests and X-rays. His scans and X-rays were reviewed.

Ali was found to have a lacerated liver and a fractured long bone with multiple superficial wounds. He was then prepared for emergency surgery.

For that, the young man was then re-wheeled into the ambulance and headed once again to the SMC where the operating theatre and intensive care unit of QEH are currently housed. By the time surgery starts, it was already nine hours from the time of his motor vehicle accident.

My story hasn’t finished, Mr Minister.

One hour into the operation, our young chap bled tremendously that he required more blood products to sustain life. It would not be another hour or so before the blood products arrive from the blood bank of QEH to the SMC.

You see YB, blood has to be taken from the patient and passed to a house officer. The house officer will fill in the necessary forms and hand them over to an attendant. The attendant will wait for a chartered bus or ambulance to head back to the Queen Elizabeth Hospital or rather, what remains of it.

Back in QEH, the attendant will wait 45 minutes for the blood to be cross-matched and then wait a while more for the arrival of a chartered bus or ambulance to ferry him (or her) back to SMC.

Anyway, being a fit and healthy young man previously, Ali survived the operation. He was admitted to the ICU and needed a repeated chest X-ray.

For that, the radiography team in QEH is informed. The duo will then take a the chartered bus or ambulance to SMC to perform the X-ray. Shooting an X-ray takes all but two minutes. Processing the cassette will take another five.

However, the processing is done back in the hospital and delivered by the next available ambulance back to SMC. By the time the X-ray films reach the patient, it could be anything from three to twelve hours later.

Dear Yang Berkhidmat (YB) Liow,

I hope you notice the unacceptable predicament our Sabahan patients (and medical staff) are facing currently. It is already six months since the initial and abrupt closure of Kota Kinabalu’s Queen Elizabeth Hospital. Since then, we have been without a proper operating theatre and intensive care unit.

We are also without distinctive wards for many of our surgical patients of most disciplines. Frankly speaking, the health crisis of the state of Sabah has run so deep and so far along that I do not where to begin.

I will instead serve an eye-opening fact to you, Mr. Liow. At the height of the Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (Sars) epidemic, the the communist government of the People’s Republic of China erected a 1,000-bed hospital within seven days.

Work on the Xiaotangshan Hospital started on April 24, 2003 and was completed on April 30, with 7,000 workers and 500 machines tirelessly on duty around the clock. Far from being a melamine-laced structure, the Xiaotangshan Hospital is equipped with the then state-of-the-art anti-infective measures and facilities.

The structure built within a week is still standing firm six years later today, ready to house any ill and potentially infective patient in the event of any unforeseen health crisis.

Mr Health Minister,

That is exactly what Sabahans are in right now – a health crisis. The Barisan Nasional government chants ‘Malaysia Boleh’ like some proverbial battle-cry but the Sabah state health crisis has proven that empty vessels make the most noise.

Unlike MCA members, not everyone enjoys being labeled a ‘squatter’. For six months, the medical staff and patients of Sabah have been housed in sections of the Sabah Medical Center paying a whooping rental of RM 90,000 per day.

For five months since our forced relocation into your prized SMC, we only had one operating room for life-threatening emergency cases. Elective surgeries were postponed indefinitely even those involving cancers and prostates and suspicious breast lumps.

We only restarted elective surgeries a month ago but even so, the backlog of cases is tremendous and catastrophic. I wonder Mr Minister, how would you like to have a tumor growing in your rectum with no avenue of getting it removed?

That is exactly what our poor Sabah folk are facing. They were without money and without a hospital to get operated in. In fact, they still don’t because they do not have a formal general hospital for Kota Kinabalu anymore.

Heck, we don’t even have our own CT scan. What we do have, however, is lots of bills to pay and debts to settle.

Is it true that the state department of health owes SMC a total of RM 6.1 million for CT scan services? Is it true that Hantaran Wira, the company contracted to provide transport to and fro SMC-QEH is paid RM500,000 per month?

Mr. Minister,

You owe the 3.4 million population of Sabah a lot of answers for wasted lives and needless deaths. Money cannot solve all problems in life. Thank you for listening.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

KY: While I might agree to most of the content above, I think political, emotional outburst and non-objectivity should be left out. For example: "Unlike MCA members, not everyone enjoys being labeled a ‘squatter’." The author of the letter is almost clearly anti-MCA/BN or at least a disappointed MCA member. If I am to take him/her out of context, I will certainly say s/he claims MCA members enjoy being labeled squatters (penghuni setinggan?) which is a blatant lie/false presumption!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

BM vs English: An Apolitical View (I mean not so political) :D

Be forewarned. This is a very long crap. :D

Jeremiah Mahadevan’s The Politics of Language is an interesting article. However, certain points in the article raised my eyebrow. ;) For example: it’s very hard to find, for example “English equivalents for geram and dengki” due to its (BM) rich vocabulary and “unbelievably intricate and precise in its expressions”; “and the quirks of its agglutinative apparatus allow one to shape any given verb or noun to express a wide variety of nuances — try using English to say terbeli or berkasut with similar brevity.” (Emphasis and underlined are mine.):p

If my memory has not failed me. English has evolved from smaller vocabulary to current very impressive one. Of course, we can say the same for BM, from a two words vocabulary (someone must correct me if this is wrong; it is just something I heard ages ago; perhaps this link will help.) to thousands of words. If English does not have equivalents of any “intricate and precise” expression/word – except for a very long explanation – she (it?) will just import or transliterate the word to become her (its?) own. Again, this is almost the same with BM, “Air boring, anyone? (Bore water, anyone?)”. ;p

I guess I should give more examples: (1) geography (transliterated to geografi, previous favoured term was ilmu alam), (2) mathematic (becomes matematik, previous favoured term was ilmu hisab, ilmu and hisab is actually an Arabic term meaning “knowledge” and “to calculate” respectively. If we are to revert to BM this (ilmu hisab) is the term we should use!), (3) chorus (you know, the part that is most repeated in the whole song, usually catchy and favoured, transliterated to korus), (4) chalet (becomes chalet, the term and sound are imported as whole although it should be written ‘shele.’), (5) T-shirt (becomes T-shirt, wait, that is English! ;) The proper BM term is kemeja-T, and even kemeja was of Portuguese origin.), (6) laser (imported whole as laser, even the proper English term is abbreviated from Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation which is supposed to be written L.A.S.E.R. but due to its wide usage the term “laser” becomes accepted as a word.); (7) RAM (imported as RAM, in English it means Random Access Memory, in BM it should be Ingatan Capaian Rawak, not a bad translation IMO, even elegant and high class! However, due to the brevity (borrowed from JM) and “pronunciability” of the term as opposed to ICR, RAM is chosen. Besides, it is more readily accepted and easier to recognise.) I could add more but I am a bit lazy. :D

So what if English doesn’t have equivalents of geram (Pissed off? Or not-so-pissed-off? Or simply “geram”? I’ll take this opportunity to introduce the Sabahan word gerigitan which means “geram” to the point of almost shaking – hands, fist, fingers, body, heart (hati not hepar or jantung) and usually associated with love or fondness. E.g.: “Comelnya baby tu, gerigitan aku dibuatnya.” That baby is so cute, I am so gerigitan (to hug, smell, kiss, pinch etc.)! ;)) or dengki (Jealous? Envious? Resent? How about "amusedly" envious? And again, how about simply “dengki”?)? English doesn’t have equivalents of many words or terms or even “quirks of its agglutinative apparatus” of all the languages in the world! Of course we can say the same for BM. Only that BM is our National Language. It is our identity, our pride, and personally, as a sign of my patriotism to be able to converse fluently in BM. Besides, what is inadequate in any language (including BM and English) is solved by transliteration or import of whole word if translation is impossible or too wordy.

Similarly, English, like BM, is not without her own “quirks of its agglutinative apparatus allow one to shape any given verb or noun to express a wide variety of nuances” (again, borrowed from JM), even though – I will allow my vanity to be spoilt ;) – BM has superior “agglutinative apparatus” which is, IMHO, appropriately termed imbuhan (Reward? Imbursement?). :)

Bush hampir terkasut.[The start of “similar brevity series”:] So what if English could not translate terbeli (bought by accident? misbuy? bought the wrong thing? Or simply ‘already’ bought 'but...'? How about terbuy?) or berkasut (wear shoes? on shoe? shoe-ed? Fortunately JM didn’t use terkasut (e.g. Bush hampir terkasut sewaktu lawatannya ke Iraq?) LOL) with similar brevity(1)? In fact, English could not translate all words/terms in any language in similar brevity(2). Some of English terms especially transliterated terms cannot be translated into BM in similar brevity(3).

For example: misadventure (pengalaman pengembaraan yang buruk), paged (dipaj? dipanggil melalui pager, or pajer?), matters (yang penting? jirim? perkara?), resort [or re-sort?] (mengambil tindakan? tempat peranginan? menyusun semula?), etc. I know, few of them have more than one meanings (like BM’s mereka: (1) they, them; (2) to create or to make) and some even are their own word themselves e.g. insight is not from in+sight which can be translated loosely in BM as pandangan (sight) dalaman (internal). I know too the meaning of the word depends on the context of the sentence, hence the difference in translation. ;)

So, what is the point of my long winded (if this was a speech) discussion? What I’m getting at is, it doesn’t matter if other languages lack our BM superiority in certain aspects because they will be or can be compensated by other means e.g. better translation, transliteration, import the word or other word with similar meaning, etc. Likewise, if BM encounter difficult or new terms, our vocabulary enrichment is in order.

Someone will eventually ask the soalan cepumas (golden question?), what is your opinion on PPSMI (BM’s Pengajaran Dan Pembelajaran Sains Dan Matematik dalam bahasa Inggeris, or in English, Teaching Science & Mathematic in English)? I would like to say, this is neither the time nor the place to throw my points. ;) Yes, I’m evading the question and I’m not ashamed of it. Yet, I could give some gleams of what I thought. I learn science & math (S&M, please, this is not porn talk!) in BM, even excelled in them. English, I learn through newspaper, comics, story books and novels, later internet.

When I learn S&M in higher level (college/university), to my disappointment, there are lacks of BM publications in S&M. The meagre supply of BM publications are written secara selamba, bagai melepas batuk di tangga (like an after thought? not seriously enough?), numerous printing errors, a bit outdated (only a bit), not concise and sometime with confusing and inelegant terms, IMO, even shame our national language! Even the teachers/lecturers were using the English term in their BM lectures. While English versions of S&M publication are difficult, many new terms and words, sometime confusing and very frustrating to learn new subjects, BUT, they are plenty, very few printing errors, almost up to date, you can find many recent journals in English but very little in BM, you can even photocopied them without as much fear as if you tried to photocopied BM version of S&M publications, haram (forbidden)! ;) So, there you are. My evasive self-asked-question reply. ;)

While I like to complain, I think it is my right and responsibility as a patriotic Malaysian to give a (stupid you say?) suggestions: Remember the series Backyard Science in Astro TVIQ channel 552? First we can buy the copyright and make our own BM version of Sains Belakang Rumah. So what if we plagiarise the whole episodes? You don’t bargain with our children’s future. The point is to make them fall in love with science, but we must not forget art, history, language etc., even patriotism! It should be made compulsory in all primary schools to have them. Yes, the Ministry should pay for it! ;) Alternatively, we can make our own full-fledged episode like that, also the Ministry will pay. What? We already have those kind of stuff? So, why didn’t I know about it? Ah well, I guess that’s it for now. I leave you the BIGGER suggestions as there have been discussed exhaustively else where. ;)

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Juliana Banos - Cinta Gila

I like this song so much. This song is the opening theme song of Astro Prima's drama "Cinta Gila" (Crazy Love) starring Aaron Aziz and Rita Rudaini. No, I didn't watch it. :D So here's the lyric. ;)



/chorus/
"ku ke kiri kau ke kanan
ku di belakang kau di hadapan
bila ku marah engkau ketawa
dengan selamba engkau berkata
kita berdua jauh berbeza
langit dan bumi tapi serasi
ku cintaimu kau cintaiku
itu saja yang perlu kau dan ku tahu"
/chorus/

kuharap bicara cinta, kau cerita tentang bola
ku ingin bersiar-siar, dikau baca surat khabar
bila ku terus keluar, kau tertidur tidak sedar
ku pulang petang jam tiga, kau pula cemburu buta

/chorus/

sepelik-pelik manusia, oh! dikau mengatasinya
dan mungkin ku juga gila, kerana masih bersama
tapi mungkin kerna itu, ku tertarik kepadamu
biarlah orang mengata, cinta kita cinta gila

/chorus/

na na na na na na na
na na na na na na na na
na na na na na na na
na na na cinta gila

(repeat)

/chorus/

itu saja yang perlu kau ku tahu (repeat)

ku cintamu kau cintaiku
cinta kita cinta gila

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Woman of My Heart (I mean my mother, not my girlfirend) :D

"International Women's Day (March 8) 2009 Theme: Women and men united to end violence against women and girls. Read here for more."
The first person who comes across my mind is my mother. There's no doubt that she's the best woman of my heart.
  • She gave birth to me and my 5 younger brothers and that's no mean feat.
  • She brought us up with love and endured our tantrum (which was almost impossible).
  • Educated us as best as she could with her not so high education (she had the misfortune of furthering her study higher than primary 6).
  • She instilled us with ethic and morality which she still believes so that we wouldn't become jerks. :D
  • Lembiding is a type of edible pakisShe is the anchor of my family through the two financial crisis (1985 in which my father lost his job and became slightly depressed & during 1997-98). I remember my mother did many things to reduce the household spending: selling nasi lemak (my brother & I used to help to sell it at our school, until the canteen staff complained and we ceased the selling); started planting vegetables, gathering lembiding at the roadside and edible mushrooms which usually bloomed after rain for food "supplement"; making and selling lihing, (or was it lee hing?); help my father (as he was too depressed himself) to find job by asking around and travel far... etc .
  • Not only that, she is the sunshine and blessed rain of my family.
I understand this is not Mother's Day but I say, "So what? She's a worthy woman."

Just for the record, I hate violence against women and girls, not only that, it is considered among my Most Hated Crimes. ;)

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

A Tribute to My Lesser Known Uncle...

I remember (with grin on my face while writing this) I cried, “His penis got hair!” when he took me to bath with him when I was about 5-6-year-old. Being a child, I was naturally shocked to see an adult (actually at that time he was just a teenager) got hair all over the groin part. He, without success, tried to muffle my voice, but being slippery from half bath with soap all over my small & nimble body, still able to evade his capture and shouted “Hairy penis!” to the embarrassment of my young uncle. :D Well, that was old story.

After I went to peninsular, I hardly saw him, well, except when Chinese New Year or long holiday. Then some time after when I was still studying, I heard he came to peninsular but I could not contact him. Then one day, he suddenly appeared outside my hostel. I was so surprised I just stood there speechless for a full minute. Surprised he suddenly came after all my failed effort to try to contact him, and of course I almost didn’t recognize him at first few seconds, he was so skinny and looked sick.

He related he was arrested along with few illegal workers for failure to produce IC (he forgot that day he said, and I believed him), when his claim of citizenship cleared, he went back to his living quarters, all his stuffs had been stolen, but luckily a friend had his IC. His friend too had been robbed by (possibly) their illegal immigrant “friends”.

He said he was embarrass to go back because he thought he was a failure in the family, which I countered by saying it didn’t matter because the family back home was worried sick of his incommunicado. So, I had to force him to go back. I borrowed from friend to buy MAS ticket and I even send him to the airport (Subang). Later, I called my family member to pick him up from KK airport. In my mind, I remembered his back when he went through the departure gate with short stride, slow step and stooped shoulder. Few months after that he committed suicide.

I was at lost at what had happened. I retraced the event from his appearance leading to the time I sent him to the airport. To my regret, I knew I missed the signs of depression and deliberately ignored his wounded pride. I asked myself, how could I be so blind and unconsidered and insensitive?!

Now, I wonder if I could turn back the clock, with my current (insufficient) knowledge of depression, would I act differently? Perhaps I would still do that but with slightly different approach. Perhaps I could contact my family member and warn them of his depressive symptoms. Perhaps I could ask them to be more caring. Perhaps I could ask them to bring him to see a psychiatrist or counseling or religious guidance.

But then, I can’t turn back time. The learning is hard. He has gone. So, I bade him, Rest in Peace. I will always remember you as a playful, resourceful, the one who wanted to make people around him (especially the family) happy and proud. And I am sorry...

P/S: Depression if left alone and managed poorly can lead to suicide. Please get help if you're having suicidal thought.

P/S2: Another article by me on depression.
Bernama news Unexplained Pain Is Depression Masked.